Growing up I remember the adult women in my life always saying that once you are a mom your life is over. So naturally, if you are told that your whole life you start to believe it right?! I never knew what that meant until I got older. I realized that what they were saying was when you become a mom thats all you are is just a mom nothing else. You don’t get to enjoy the things you once loved before you became a mom.
When I got pregnant with my daughter it was unplanned and I was nervous. My fiance and I (now husband) at the time weren’t trying but we weren’t not trying either LOL! We talked about having children, and we agreed that we did want kids so we were excited to be having a child. But a little piece of me was afraid though I am not going to lie.
Right before getting pregnant I finally found my passion. Before this time I was depressed because I didnt have any hobbies or things I really enjoyed to do that made me feel “good” you know? I started my blog in 2012 as an outlet. My love for writing was found again. I found MY thing and I was, and still am excited about blogging and social media every day. I enjoyed the media/marketing industry and I could feel myself working in the industry (eventually I did) and I felt excited about life.
But, a little bit of me was so scared and worried that once I had my daughter I would never be able to enjoy life and the things I loved because all I would have time to do was be a mom.
When I got laid off from my job in 2016 I decided that I would consider being a work at home mom. I saw everyone else doing it and I thought well couldn’t be that bad right? I freelanced for a while and stayed home for 6 months but, I quickly learned that the stay at home life wasn’t for me. I realize that for some women it is but for me it just wasn’t and that is OKAY, everyone is different. I felt bad for feeling this way, but I am not going to lie, I felt bad because I wanted more for myeslf. As moms we should want more for ourselves right?
Sometimes when I am around a group of moms and we talk and I share what I do they are like girl you are out here “living your best life.” Sometimes I wonder, does that I am not being the best mom because I’m choosing to follow my passions and dreams? Sometimes others can make you feel that way, I know it’s not intentional though. What if you don’t want to be a full -time entrepreneur because you actually like working outside the home and dont mind working for someone else? I still have a side hustle and I CAN do both! Is it that you are not being a good mom if you work all the time and travel you just cant do both. The reality is, you can. When I see other women put working moms down because they are not stay at home moms or full-time entraprenuers so that they can be with their kids all the time it makes me sad. We can do both and be good at both. We can follow our dreams, travel and have an amazing career! Secure the bag sis!
The longer I am a mom, the more I realize how important it is for me to have work or hobbies outside that help me continue to feel like myself! Moms, I’m here to encourage you not to lose yourselves in “just being a mom”. If you lose yourself in the process of being a mom, how much will you have left to give to your children? Your husband? You cannot pour from an empty cup.
Now please believe me when I say that I LOVE being a mom! But that is not the only title I have. I’m more than that and so are you. It can be real easy to lose yourself. We often forget that we have dreams, goals, and God-given purpose and talents in life. We tend to limit our conversations to
Go after your dreams! You can and will still be a good mother! I know that some of us have more help than others but please take care of yourselves mammas. Do something for yourself if you can. It makes a difference.
xoxo Michelle
